In these days of the nanny state and ludicrous health and safety initiatives, I felt I too should jump on the bandwagon. So here are some handy tips to avoid personal injury. Bubble wrap can be used to make a fashionable suit of clothes, and will protect you from blows and buffets. Wearing a crash helmet 24/7 saves you from more than just unexpected brain injury - think of the money you'll save on visits to the hairdresser. Having a bad hair day? Who's to know!

And finally, and more seriously, if you end up wearing paint and charcoal dust for a living, you may want to look at this handy chart, which lists the health hazards of various art gears, and what to do to minimise the risks.

No, really, you're welcome. Think nothing of it. Just doing my civic duty.

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